some things we need to work on

A particularly unpleasant exchange on Facebook prompted me to write this. Stay with me, I think it’s important.

Calling somebody a pussy needs to stop being a go-to insult aimed at emasculating somebody. As we all know, pussy is a slang term for vagina, and it’s used in context to indicate your impression that the object of your derision is somehow weak, feminine and unworthy of your respect.

In all seriousness, if you want to see the strength and power of a pussy, watch a child being born. You will have a new and heightened respect for how powerful a pussy is. In a problem birth, instead of failing, the pussy holds strong, and sometimes the skin around it will tear. That’s how strong the pussy is – it forces other aspects of the body to fail because it refuses to fail itself.

If you call me a pussy, then, I refuse to feel weak. I will feel powerful. I will feel strong. I will feel resilient. Birthing a child is something no man can do, and it is the single most powerful expression of humanity there is.

Serving in the military does not make you a better person than I am. Holding a commission doesn’t make you smarter than I am.  Enlisting doesn’t make you more patriotic than I am. Being willing to kill somebody our government has decided is our collective enemy doesn’t make you more willing to kill than I am – it just means you got paid to do it by the government.

Serving in the military does not automatically make you a hero, nor does it automatically engender respect. You must still serve honorably to be respected for your time in uniform. You must behave heroically to be a hero. There are actual heroes in this world who have never served a day in uniform, and there are those who gave their lives for their country. Every country has heroes, dead and alive, and it’s not stripes on their sleeves or insignia on their collars that made them such.

I was part of a military family for 17 of my first 18 years. I grew up on military bases all over the USA and Europe. I have seen heroes and I have seen goldbricks, and I tell you this – there are way more goldbricks than there are heroes in the military forces of any nation. I have met men and women who, under orders and compelled by our government, have rained death and destruction down upon their fellow humans. Some of them are heroes, most of them are not. Doing your job does not make you a hero.

Having a different opinion about national events and policies does not make you smarter, more valuable as a citizen or more important than I am. It also does not give you the moral high ground. Disagreeing with you does not make me a traitor, nor does disagreeing with me make you one.

Having an opinion is one thing. Defending it with hurtful words and threats is something else. It takes a lot to offend me, but once I reach that point, you better believe I’m going to say something about it.

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3 thoughts on “some things we need to work on

  1. An aside… I find it funny that we often use words to indicate weakness without grasping the irony. Pansy is one of the most durable, hearty, resilient flower. Plus it’s beautiful. And edible.

    If you haven’t seen it yet… There’s a great meme out there with Betty White talking about balls and pussies. Worth looking up. 😁

    You have been a balm on fb lately ask found myself feeling obligated to spread truth where I could. I try not to care so much usually. Mostly those people don’t hear truth so I don’t bother.

    Thanks 🙂 always. Sun

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

  2. I, for one apologize for the absolute delight I took in the aforementioned exchange. I took issue with the way certain people were being treated and responded in kind as opposed to taking the high ground and leaving it be. I’m sorry I left that kind of poop on your page. I will try to avoid such activity in the future. I was really incensed and went too far in my retort.

    • I felt bad for hiding your comments along with the rest of the thread (which I have preserved as a reminder to myself of what an out-of-control discussion looks like) because they were probably the most cogent – aggressive and retaliatory, sure, but solidly logical and unwavering. Completely on point.

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